Wherein onions and garlic are meat, not vegetables

I learned something new today: onions and garlic may be meat! -- not vegetables! That's right, contrary to popular "fishwives' knowledge," onions and garlic are harvested from the rare (and often factory-farm-abused) onionater and garlic-bat.

Luckily for us modern, updated, healthy, local, new-age vegetarians, there are a few local restaurants that cater to our forward-thinking palate.
... or maybe onions and garlic are the lactations of these animals? In any case, thank goodness this food is finally available!


This post's theme word is: bumf, "unwanted or uninteresting printed matter such as governmental forms, legal documents, junk mail, promotional pamphlets, etc." That food is so bland that it verges on edible bumf.

Hangover II

The Hangover Part II was entirely predictable. The NYTimes review accurately states that it is "largely mirthless" funniest parts are "once again carefully elided in the actual movie." It's basically a remake of The Hangover, with all the danger-stakes upped. (Las Vegas --> Thailand. Missing groom --> missing minor. Tooth pulled --> finger amputated. Baby --> drug-running monkey. Prostitute --> prostitute. And so on, find-and-replace style.) This makes the movie -- once again experienced in a daze shared with the hungover main characters as they attempt to unravel the previous night's revelries -- more tense and less meaningful. Let's face it, we know that everyone is going to be fine at the end. Because they want to make The Hangover Part III, and then The Hangover Part IV, at which point all of the protagonists will be married and they'll start to make Hangover movies for the divorce parties.

I saw it as a fun time-waster. It was certainly one of those things!


This post's theme word is caitiff, "cowardly, despicable" (or as a noun, meaning such a person). The caitiff writers banged out another vile movie populated by caitiff characters.