These have accumulated for awhile and I might've missed some as there is currently a "scratch notebook" infestation throughout the rooms of my house.
Out-of-context semi-anonymized quotes for your enjoyment!
I: "Evidence is really piling up for us living in a weird simulation. Let's have their teeth fall out, try that!"
M: "What's the official wine pairing for bacon-wrapped chicken?"
L: "Bacon-wrapped wine."
Z: "There's more red flags than potential here."
G: "I'm discovering things about people I never knew."
L: "By looking at their backgrounds?"
G: "By listening to what they say!"
N: "I like that JavaScript is being described as low-level here."
Z: "You accidentally muted yourself."
I: "No, I did it on purpose, but at the wrong time."
M: "I was such a good writer back then. That was before I went to grad school, I can tell."
F: "The problem with legacy code is, they did a lot of stuff in the past, and they keep doing it!"
Z: "Do you have a job, or is this, like, private daycare?"
D: "He died of syphilis because he had all these... incubis... you know?"
Z+D (simultaneously, uncoordinated): "Maybe don't do your taxes today."
M: "I think it'll work out in our favor!"
D: "Julius Caesar was not another Groundhog's Day."
L: "Isn't it being livestreamed on the IRS Facebook page?"
K: "That is a cursed sentence."
I: "I don't trust the government. I don't trust anyone! I don't trust myself! I do trust Paypal."
A: "Tomato grove?"
B: "Tomato thicket."
I, on the topic of grad school: "It was actually quite useful, but not directly."
F: "You know, I'm in a perfect position here to rob the bank."
R: "Can I promise that the results of this won't be used for evil, anywhere, ever? No."
I: "We're all just in a sorry state."
Z: "surveil and digitize" (which I suggested would be a good evil catchphrase)
L: "The problem with buying a fanny pack is..."
Z: "No, I don't want a duck-face filter, I want a duck filter. I want to look like a duck."
D: "When I look at the scores, I think... we shouldn't have explained to her how the points work."
L: "I like to say a long goodbye and get cut off so that my children feel an obligation to talk to me again soon."
D: "Mom, I don't think you should reveal the secrets of how you maintain the social contract!"
This post's theme word is meech (v), "to whine" or "to move in a furtive manner" or "to loiter." Stop meeching about the park, meeching to each other, I see you meeching over there!
